This is why I decided to experiment with some veggie-heavy variations of the traditional veggie burger last night in my own labratory. Since it is hard to find a veggie burger that does not don a soy mask in the name of "meat substitute," I decided to create my own green-glow monster. Before diving head-on into the realm of science, there were a few things I needed to assess:
A method to that madness? [Say wha'?]
Science is tough, eh? It's not all lab coats and cute scientists. So, before jumping into the lab, I guess I needed to devise a scientific plan. Usually I say "ah, criminy" when it comes to devising plans, but this research was, well, how should I say this...this research could mark a shift in the path of hippie history. May no other hippie man, woman, or child be forced to consume another frozen disk infused with liquid smoke!
So, after eating a banana and pondering real hard, I came up with a research plan:
Veggie-Heavy Veggie Burgers
(makes about 5 or 6)
1/2 onion, diced
1/2 green bell pepper, diced
3 ribs of celery
2 jalapenos, diced
3 cloves of garlic, minced
2 TBS olive oil
1/2 tsp. of cloves
1 tsp. whole cumin seeds
dash of turmeric
2 TBS. sesame seeds
2 slices of toasted wheat bread, crumbled into pieces
1 package frozen peas
1 can black beans
a few handfuls of kale cut into small strips
salt and pepper to taste
1. Saute first five ingredients in the list in olive oil for 7-10 minutes on medium heat. When onions become slightly transparent, then you can add the cloves, cumin, turmeric, salt and pepper. Coate veggies in spices, and then add the sesame seeds and kale strips. Saute for another minute, and then remove from heat.
2. In a large bowl, mash together your black beans and peas. Add salt and pepper to taste. Add the cooked veggies and toast to the mashed legumes. Stir until combined.
3. Form mixture into patties, and then grill over medium heat. My burgers sort of fell apart, which is what future research in this burgeoning field will hopefully rectify. However, don't fret. Just eat the pieces that fall up during the flip. Cook about 2 minutes on both sides, and then serve on your bread of choice!
(Unfortunately, the brilliance of these burgers was so intense that the pictures developed all blurry and postmodern. And I take yet another step toward digital photography...)